Dominance
The Jekyll and Hyde Contradiction…
Emerging From The Darkness…
She had abolished herself within the dark dungeon because of the way she had been treated and viewed by all those outside. She had waited what seemed like a lifetime for the One Person that had the key to release her. For the One Person that was willing to bring her out of the darkness and accept her within the light. The One Person that could unlock the door to allow her to finally be free to fly. The One Person that could release her from the darkness she thought she would always be within.
As the door opened and the light He brought to her laid it’s beams upon her wings, they naturally spread as if she had always known how to fly. Yet, she was afraid of what lied beyond the door. At least in the darkness she knew what to expect. He didn’t drag her into the light, but instead patiently waited. He encouraged and offered support for her new life as she slowly left the darkness behind and stepped into the light. She knew that she owed everything to Him, for after all He was the one that held the key that would allow her to be who she has always been destined to be, and would completely accept her as she was.
As tears of happiness rolled down her face, she took his outstretched hand to begin the Dauntless Journey down the path she had needed to be led down her entire life. She could finally feel her wings spread wider than they ever had before as she felt the care, love, and safety in his guidance. She was still afraid, but only of the unknown. Yet, she trusted Him with every ounce of her being, would give him her very best, and knew this was exactly where she was meant to be.
~DV~
Because He Said So…?
It means the sub/slave has given him that right and authority over her.
It means she has consented this power to such a person.
It’s because she sees and feels him as worthy of such power and control.
It’s because he has earned the right to be able to be that way with her.
It’s because he has earned her respect in the Dominant position h has with her.
It’s because he has put in the time, effort and work to get t that point with her.
Control In Daily Life…
Every relationship involves two people. Two people that rely on each other to meet their needs, make them feel good, and to make them feel fulfilled. It’s a bond they felt from the start and has grown deeper as the relationship has progressed. It involves a lot of trust, communication and mutual respect. A power exchange relationship (D/s, M/s, etc…) is no exception to this, and may even have some of these characteristics that are even more prevalent than their vanilla counterparts.As we all know, much of what those of this in this lifestyle do and portray is very sexual in nature. Whether it’s written blogs, websites, Fetlife, Tumblr, or whatever the case may be, what we run across more times than not is the sexual elements. This may be justified to some degree, as much of the time these relationships are about sexual Domination and submission. Yet, I think it’s the aspects of these relationships outside of the sexual realm that are the foundation that makes them strong. It’s the day to day interactions and normal daily life that people build lasting relationships upon, and not wild unadulterated sex, although we will all agree that is the fun part of this.
For many people it seems to be easy to engage in some type power exchange relationship sexually. Yet, when it comes to daily life decisions it seems to be more difficult. People appear to have a harder time taking or giving up control in daily life than they do with giving up control of their own bodies. For me personally as a Dominant, part of my rules is that I have the last word and the power to make all decisions. I want my partners views, thoughts, and opinions, and will always take that into account, but in the end I have the say. That doesn’t mean I want total control, that I’m overly Domineering, or that it’s my way or nothing by any means. It just establishes the boundaries for which we will conduct ourselves. This rule is easy to say but is much harder for both people to actually carry out.
There are times that I may make decisions and that is the end of discussion. Yet, more times than not, it is a combination of my own decision and my subs decision. I don’t conduct my relationship as a dictatorship or like a communist regime. I don’t want a mindless sub or slave. I want someone that can contribute to our relationship to make us both better and stronger. I want someone who can think for themselves and will also make decisions that are for the betterment of us.
Giving up control on decisions that affect your life and will have long term consequences can be scary. It takes a lot of trust and respect for the other person, and this can take a long time to develop. So least to say, when my sub comes to me to help her make life decisions it can be very gratifying. It shows me the depth of what we have fostered together. It shows me the true submission she has towards me in letting me in to make these decisions for her. It shows me the trust she has in me to make decisions that could affect and alter her life long term. This could be financially related, about a career or job position, a situation with a friend, one of the children, or any number of possible scenarios. She knows that based on our relationship dynamic my opinion carries a lot of weight, and she will likely have to go with my stance on the matter. Ultimately, this is what she needs and expects of me, though. This is the leader she needs me to be. Even still, I don’t just tell her what to do and nothing else is allowed, but rather try to equip her with information to make an informed decision on her own. A true leader doesn’t demand, he inspires.
For a Dominant that lives this lifestyle and conducts his relationship within a power exchange dynamic, in all aspects of a relationship and not just sexually, trust and respect are everything. These are attributes that are earned and gained. So, having your submissive trust you in all aspects of your relationship, and to make decisions that are potentially life altering, is such a satisfaction. It can make you beam inside with delight in seeing the depth your relationship has reached and just how how far the two of you have come together. With this comes a lot of responsibility. You have to make sure you are ready and able to carry that weight on your shoulders and live with the consequences of your actions. Those actions affect not only you, but also your partner. I am more than willing to accept this responsibility. After all, reaching this point is what we have been striving for as part of the progression of what we have and both need, or at leas it should be, as part of our power exchange dynamic and relationship.
Handing Over The Belt…
I have to admit, there is an appeal or maybe curiosity in everything about this. I know how the belt feels and I can’t exactly lie and say I don’t enjoy it. But how it can clear ones mind, give them the reset or release they need is very intriguing to me. I do love the thought of coming to him on my knees, handing him the belt and asking for help. Feeling safe in asking to be beaten. Trusting that there’s not judgement, only understanding. Then feeling his total possession and control as I put myself in his hands, trusting that he will give me what I need. And yes, knowing that only he decide when I’ve had enough and it’s done. I think that this could possible go both ways though. There has to be a great feeling for him during this too. Feeling and expressing Dominance and power. Maybe not the same sort of reset or release, but similar. So maybe the scenario isthat he had some long days at work with traveling and one thing after another. I can see and feel the stress weighing on him when he gets home. So I come to him, hand him his belt, strip, and offer my ass (head down ass up) to beat. Clearing his mind and giving him the release he needs. Submitting to and taking the pain because that’s what Master needs. The amount of love, respect, and trust it entails (for both of us) is simply beautiful to me!